im BACK!

I've been gone for a while yes I know

While I was gone I ate and ate and ate some more I went back to 174Lbs

Then one day I got on the scale and saw how much I weighed and I just stood there and cried my eyes out

But for some good news
I'm 150Lbs right now I lost 24Lbs and all it took was a bit of self control and my best friend ana

I wanna go down to 130Lbs bf school is out wish me luck

And I'm going on a 50 day diet its called the ABC Diet aka (Ana Boot Camp Diet)

Ill try to tell you gals about my day to day progress but if not ill get on here when I can <333333333333333333

Stay strong my pretties

Gone.

lately ive been soooo stressed
thats why i havent written a blog in a while
with school and my family
i gained 19lbs since my last blog
and i feel like i want to die

lately ive been thinking
that i need to retouch my relationship with ana and mia
they were my only friends this summer
and i dont want to leave them

im going to be gone for a while im not going to
write another blog till i loose 30lbs

so ill see you ladies then.....

its pretty

well
i like to keep myself busy
because it helps me get my mind off the hunger pains and stuff

so i decided to make like a banner
for my blog it looks really pretty

and i made my display picture a real pic of me
but i cropped out my face

i really like this blog
it gives me something to do
to keep my mind busy

i think im going to try to write a blog or two a day

and i have 3 new followers
i thought that this was just gonna be a blog
that only i read

i hope some of the stuff on my blog
helps you gals reach ur goals

and umm if u want
can u give some feedback on the new banner
i want to make my blog pretty
and entertaining so girls
can come on my blog and keep themselves busy

so they can reach their goal
thin.perfect.skill

I Passed The Test

lately ive been feeling as if ana has been testing me
and i passed the test
so much has happened to me since i wrote my last blog
i havent lost any weight because ive been so stressed
but ive reconnected with myself
ive patched up my relationship with ana
im ready
ive changed


i sat down at the dinner table last night
and i just stared at the food for about 2 hours

my family had a huge cook out the other day
and like everyone was eating and just eating more and more

it was so disgusting

my aunt asked me if i wanted a cheese burger
and i said no but she kept asking
i felt like lashing out at her
so i just took the fucking burger

then went inside and threw it away

and the fucking burger grease got on my hand
and like i washed my hands sooooo hard

food is making me sick
when i look at it i just want the puke


HUNGER IS A FEELING
BEING THIN IS A SKILL

thoughts

im getting thinner
why am i not happy
everyone is telling me how skinny i look
but yet inside i feel like a fat cow
are they just telling me im skinny
so i can eat a get fat like them
mt ribcage is starting to show
but i still dont feel satisfied
the guy that i was with dumped me
he said that something about me changed
causing me to binge and purge
im growing weaker and weaker by the day
till it reaches the point where it hurts to breathe
my best friend matt is starting to notice something
he notices everything about me
i just wish he would notice that ive been in love with him
since the day we became friends
all his girlfriends have been perfect size zeros
maybe i should be like them and then maybe he would want me

i feel like ana is testing me
to see how faithful i am
but i dont know how much i can take

every single day the urge to kill myself gets stronger and stronger
i dont know anymore whether i want to live or die
ana please give me the strength to be strong
give me hope
have faith in me.....

I binged today

it was horrible
i ate 2 whole things of oreo cookies
3 cheese burgers
2 slices of pizza
and 4 packets of gummie bears
i feel soooo horrible
i had to throw it all up i just had
to and it horrible i feel like
a fat house i just want to kill myself right now

Problem

its been a while since i posted a blog
ive been really busy
but anyway

im finding it hard to loose more weight
i was doing fine when i lost the 13lbs
but lately it seems i havent been losing any weight at all

and since my nationality is jamaican
and the women from there are naturally very curvy
its like even harder for me to loose weight

like im ok with my big hips because i love being hip bones
and they poke out very nicely

but i hate a butt and my thighs
ive been going squats
do i can tone up my thighs so they wont be
so flabby

and another thing thats really starting to buck me is
my aunt has a cook out ever weeked
and like if i only eat one hamburger they get mad at me
and go like oh you should eat more you know you want it anyway

im so glad i have self control
while my family are getting fat
im going to be skinny and beautiful


fat people discuss me
they go to a fucking fast food place
and order up all the fucking food
and have the nerve to ask for a diet coke
like thats going to help your fat ass loose weight

ughh if i gain even one pound
i will do anything it takes to loose it
im going to be fasting again this week
to make up for the food i ate at the cookout